New Year's Drama

One awkward gentleman whom I still fancied, if that is possible, was present in my usual dreadful New Year’s party.

The past three years or more witnessed a series of absolutely hideous parties.

This one was no exception.

One of the despicable consequences of the isolated gay community in Cairo is that everyone is “consorting” with everyone else. And everyone is somehow a “dear friend” of everyone else.
Not surprisingly my awkward gentleman is a “dear friend” of my favorite Capricorn.
And due to a feud and irreconcilable differences between my awkward gentleman and my favorite Capricorn, I did not allow myself to pursue him any further.

Despite my very strong urge to do so.

The fact that my host kept pointing out to my single status as a medical condition I should get rid off did not help. And the fact that I attended another hetero-homosexual overlap party seemed to surprise everyone, including my stupefied host. Who kept wondering why on earth would I come to his party, if I was single, and said I would go to a gay party myself had I not hosted this one!

After wine and vodka and all kinds of fermented fruit juices were consumed, and when my awkward gentleman was intoxicated beyond hope I figured this is the moment of truth.
As the clock ticked treacherous time away, it finally struck twelve and in attempt to start a “fresh start”, the two long estranged friends made up. And I was finally able to share a cigarette with my awkward gentleman. My time longed for cigarette.
And with the first cigarette of the New Year, and with the first few drags and the first few puffs that were blown into the worn out air, this conversation took place:

Awkward Gentleman: You are a very nice guy, but the only person I have ever loved is your bestfriend

Me: I could tell as much

Awkward gentleman: You are a very nice guy but me and your friends are not compatible, and even your bestfriend is not suitable for me

Me: I understand as much

Awkward Gentleman: You deserve better

Me: Believe me when I tell you I think you do too

And with these few words I made any stupid excuse and left the already horrendous party.

And even Cairo did not spare me. At one am in the morning you would think there is little or no traffic. But no, not in Cairo, cars were stacked on the bridge at one am in the morning. And I sat in the cab thinking, "what use is it all?"